Nihilism for Dummies!

29 February 2004

Leap Day: Jump someone.

So, it's Leap Day, which we have because time is a more-or-less meaningless construct invented by very anal people long, long ago, who couldn't count very well and therefore created a time system and calendar that are deeply flawed.

OK, that's a gross oversimplification. But, it's kind of true, if you think about it. There have been lots of methods for counting time over the millenia, and most of them pretty well suck. Now, certain geek friends of mine want a pure-decimal system of time, and I've told him good luck with that. For now, let's just use the crappy system we've got and deal with leap year, and leap seconds (although they may be on the way out) and have fun. Ok? Ok.

The Fickle American Media

In tiny print, five or six paragraphs down, a short blip on the CNN crawl. The words. "Deny." "Capture." "Bin Laden."

Meanwhile, in Australia, Pakistan, Iran, and China, the headlines yesterday were such as these:

• Osama bin Laden captured: IRNA news agency (China)
• Osama arrested in secret: Report (Australia)

Now, this didn't make even a noticeable stir in American media. Just the above, very low key, denials. And now, today, stories about the source of the story being misquoted. Misunderstood. Just plain wrong.

The spin is spinning.

So, is bin Laden in custody? Or dead? Both? For how long? And does anyone even care anymore? Is it unreasonable to believe, as many do, that the White House has been sitting on bin Laden for weeks, maybe months or years, and used Iraq as a two-year diversion in order to whip bin Laden out in time for a Novemeber Election surprise?

If that sounds far-fetched, keep in mind that similar things have happened.

And the winner is....

The Academy Awards are tonight. Yay. Tune in and watch Hollywood ejaculate all over itself. Hopefully Bill Murray will win and say some more funny shit on live television.

26 February 2004

Bush to Haiti, "Fuck You."

Castro gets a sniffle, two hundred Cubans hit the shores of Florida, whisked into long black cars and given membership to all Miami's best private clubs. The shit hits the fan in Haiti and those poor folks get a military escort back to their shitty beaches.

Winning hearts and minds is such an easy task for such a generous, fair and righteous country.

So, that's the socio-political lecture this month. Back to your lattes, yuppie.

23 February 2004

Your future dream is someone else's shopping scheme

Dustbins. No future. Burning down the house of pain. Perhaps, after all, there is such a thing as fate or karma. Or, maybe there is a god and s/he/it exists to remind me that there is no god. Just when you thought it was safe to finally say, "Punk is dead," that bastion of all-that-has-street-cred, the New York Times runs a piece on how punk is not only not dead, and not only just living, but is thriving and expanding.

You may now cancel my lifelong tour pass to angst.

I guess in some way, this ties back into my feeling of being old, jaded, and maybe something else. I don't have much reason to feel any of these things. After all, I was never in a scene as a young'un - or at any other time, for that matter - and I'm not in a scene now. Don't think I'd want to be. It's kinda high school, in some ways.

Mi amigo Jacks says I'm confused, and I agree with him. But I still know what annoys me, even if I can't always pin down any real good reason for it.

22 February 2004

No text. No comment.

20 February 2004

Newsflash!

Actually, I have nothing of interest to state at the moment. I just always wanted to use that headline. Ha. Move along.

First up today, this next bit is for my big butt lover boy Andy. In the future, don't send me silly mail unless you want to be implicated in my homosexual love triangle. Ha.

Now, isn't that cute?

So, yea. Someone owns a copyright on GIF images, and supposedly I shouldn't use them. Right? Is that still the case? Does anyone know or care? Well, if its true, then someone might want to mention that to the folks over at OSDN, 'cause I got these hideous things from one of their associated sites. It's kind of gross, like finding a book of not-so-hot girl porn under your older brother's bed. I mean, he should know better, right?

Anybody but Bush!

My god, that sounds great, doesn't it? Getting rid of Bush would be a godsend for the New Left. And, it looks like all they need to do that is to nominate John Kerry, a "real liberal" who "stands apart from Dubya."

Yea. Whatever. I told people in 2000 that they might as well vote for Nader, because nothing would ever change, no matter who was in office.

11 February 2004

Ahhhh! The French!

Weeee dooo not like eeenythiing not of France. Weee must preeteeend to bee oh-so-progressive when weee are nothing but silly cultural xenophobes.

Sorry about that lame-ass attempt at doing a French accent in text. But, hell, it's true - isn't it? The French, those same brilliant people that had to create a word for CD-ROM in their language (no shit. look it up), have now passed legislation barring the wearing of religious symbols in their public schools.

The French don't get it.

Before I go farther, you should know that I don't support relgious shows of any kind. They're outdated, outmoded and just plain stupid. Religion does little else in this world aside from convince otherwise intelligent people that "everything will be ok" after they're dead and that "god has reasons for what happens down here on earth." Well, that is malarkey, in my book, and I don't care what religion you think I should look into - I'm gonna call it crap. So, losing some headgear and jewelry would be ok by me....except:

I don't like governments intruding in people's lives. That's just as shitty as being surrounded by relgious kids in school. Maybe worse.

And this is why I don't argue religion of politics. Well, ok, not much. Heh.

4 February 2004

Janet has Tits! Right-Wing Offended!

No, this isn't old news. This is just a rant on what's fast becoming the most annoying story of 2004. Janet showed some boob. Holy crap! The FCC is pissed! The GOP is saddened! Justin is frustrated! Janet is apologetic!

And they are all wearing thin on me.

Janet, dear, let me start with you. Stop fucking apologizing. You have owned since Rhythm Nation, and probably before that. Just tell the networks and the FCC, "Fuck you. I did it. I meant to do it and I'd do it again. Half this country has tits and the other half has seen them." That is life.

Now, to the FCC. Fuck you. You assholes only last week remembered that you could actually fine someone and now, holy shit, you are actually doing it! If you are going to fine CBS for indecency and/or "inappropriate exposure," then can you at least add fines for the Kid Rock and P. Diddy portions of the halftime show? They lasted far longer than the brief second of Tit and were far more offensive to the average citizen. First, P. Diddy is a lousy excuse of a rapper and Kid Rock has decided to, sadly, live up to all the silly White Trash stereotypes that he seemed to poke fun at three years ago. Oh, and one more thing. Please find out about this thing called web standards. Post your fucking releases in something other than the two Closed Source, Proprietary standards of Word Docs and PDF files.

To the NFL. What the fuck did you think letting MTV ru(i)n your halftime show was going to get you? Dumbasses.

Justin. Justin Effin Timberlake. Please e-mail me immediately and tell me what it was like.

Now, to the GOP. First, fuck you in general. Nothing specific. Just fuck you. Next, fuck you for making a big deal over the halftime show. Okay? You are hypocrites. Calling Willie and Toby's pre-game show "family-friendly?" Willie's a tax-dodging doper, you shit-heads and Toby's a fucking psycho who doesn't think our job in Iraq will be done until he can fucking retire there and call it "Florida East." And fuck you some more for criticizing the hapless Kid Rock for doing something that you fuckers do every day: Wrapping selves in American Flag. You guys do it, too. Don't deny it. The Flag and Fetus. The GOP. Two great tastes that taste bitter in your mouth.

(note: this rant about the GOP continued for nine more pages before being edited for length and coherence by three of my close friends. it will be included here in its entirety at a later date)

Lastly, Fuck You for continuing the Idiotization of this country. Calling the Super Bowl a "hallowed tradition" and "national celebration" is utterly without contempt. I mean, come on....

1 February 2004

Welcome to February. This year, Black Folk in America get One Whole Extra Day to celebrate their History without fear of being called revisionists or racists. Congratulations, I'm sure that extra day makes up for something, doesn't it?

Oh, dear. Did I say that?

Anyways, I don't think it matters one way or another whose history we celebrate or teach or whatever else. What I care about is that history is taught honestly. Which is one reason we have a Black History Month, because history was never taught fairly in this country. Still isn't. Ask a teenager if it is right for workers to go on strike during a war, and if they think it has ever happened in this country. Hell, ask a college senior or grad student these things. We have no concept of history, as a people or as individuals.

Which is why I usually say, "fuck it." It isn't worth worrying about. Screw the past, let's just work on not totally fucking up our present or our future. And, yet, that's just what we let happen every day. Worry about elections and wars and policy more than what is happening right next to us. Remember the song "Water Pistol Man?" (of course you don't):

"water pistol man/full of ammunition
putting out fires/on a world wide mission
but what about the fire in your own backyard?"

So. Just live and be grumpy, ok?

lyrics from "Water Pistol Man"
The Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy

From the Stupid-Acronyms-Make-It-Scarier Dept

Welcome to the Future. Your life is recorded. Stored. Filed away. By a private company, accountable to no one. Everything you have bought, everywhere you have been. Everyone you know. Your government is involved, whether they want to be or not.

And it's called MATRIX.

Just sounds stupid, right? Well, sorry kids, it is real.

Now, as I've said before, I just don't give a fuck. Let them put a file down for me. I don't need to keep it a secret that I think our corporate and public "leaders" are a bunch of homocidal jackasses that should be lined up and tried for crimes against humanity. No secret at all that I'd like nothing more than to see the Great American Empire crumble. No secrets and you have no need for all this privacy. After all, the Freedoms of Speech and Privacy are not quite inclusive.

Nihilism for Dummies is not about nihilism. It is not for dummies. It is not a weblog. It is not all it is cracked up to be.